So there was an article in the Sunday paper today that Jay has asked me to read. I should pre-empt this post with saying that a "hot topic" right now is abortion rights. With that, the paper had an article with a Nebraska lady that had to face the same sort of terrible, heart wrenching news that we received only she didn't receive the news until 21 weeks that a problem was there. Her water broke prematurely, she entered the hospital where they told her there was a chance that her body could reproduce the amniotic fluid that she lost but that the baby would have less than a 10% chance of making it and in the slim chance that she did that she would probably be severely disabled. They wanted the doctor to help them and help prevent their child from suffering but the doctor's hands were tied because they were after the 20 week "deadline", for the lack of a better term. Nebraska passed the anti-abortion law 2 months before indicating that no action can be taken after 20 weeks. They had to return home and wait for labor to start, their daughter was born 8 days later and she had to hurt and struggle to breathe for 15 very long minutes while her parents sat there and watched her suffer.
The other side of the story was a young lady who's mother decided to have an abortion while she was pregnant with her as a freshman in college. She lied about how far along she was telling the doctor's she was 18 weeks when in fact she was 31 weeks along and got an injection to terminate the pregnancy; the daughter survived to tell the story about it.
The point of me typing this all over, allowing my blood pressure to go through the roof all over again, and to allow myself to angry all over again is that there seems to be very, very different perspectives on what the definition of abortion is!!!! There is a huge difference between abortion and helping your child! There is a difference between ending a baby's life because you are too young, irresponsible, and even if it was completely against your will and trying to prevent your child from the pain and suffering that they would experience without the choice. I am very PRO-LIFE, the doctor that performed our procedure with Angel is PRO-LIFE; I am not for a women going into a clinic because they forgot to use a condom and she can't or doesn't want to take care of the baby; but it is a totally different story when you know that your child is going to suffer for every single breathe they take, hurt and suffer every minute that goes by and you want to prevent them from having to go through that; all so you can spend 1, 3, 15 minutes with him or her. I continue to say that I don't judge or think badly of anyone that decides to take that route either! I commend them for their strength and courage and being able to experience that as well.
I know this is a very, very touchy subject and one that I would never in a million years had thought would affect me as much as it does not but everytime I hear or read comments like the one I read in the paper about "someone can try to tell my daugther that her life isn't worth fighting for" that infuriate me and make me want to scream at anyone that wants to tell me that if I had any chance in the world to fight for my daughter, to know that my daughter wouldn't suffer or that I could suffer instead of my daughter and know that she would live (disabled or not!) and still be with us that I would do anything but everything in the world...well, I am not really sure how I would react rationally but I can assure anyone that wants to think poorly of our decision to essentially save our daughter from the pain and suffering that she would have experienced as anything other than doing the best thing that I could do as a mother for her little girl, they have no idea what the process was like to have to do anything like it. And I would continue to tell them that, god forbid, they ever had to go through something like that, when they had to make that decision then they could judge me; until then, to shut the hell up!
I have always refused to use the "A" word, I don't consider that what we did, I don't consider it something that we did wrong and have never regretted the decision because I know that my little girl didn't hurt or suffer. I have only discussed the decision that we had to make with very few people because there is so much unsurity on who you can trust and who won't judge you; but I have come to terms that is what it was considered. However, there is a big difference between definitions and anyone that has ever had to face a situation like that would understand. Anyone that never has, well, I really hope some of them start to think before they judge and decide what others have had to painstakingly go through wasn't because they wanted to!!
I am not really sure that this has made me feel a whole lot better or if it's made me feel even worst....: ( I am going to have to lean towards worst. I will wait for a better time to update on B2K!
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